You know when I was growing up I never imagined
that I would grow up, get married, and then divorce. But hey life has a way of getting in the way
of the best laid plans. So that leaves
me in my current predicament; How to successfully co-parent with an idiot.
Looking
back I now can see that there were many red flags about my ex that I should
have noticed before I actually married him and had children with him, but that
is all water under the bridge now. We
have two amazing boys that he just can’t seem to properly parent. He sees them about once a month at the most,
and maybe a week in the summer and one around the holidays. I find that I struggle with how to effectively
co-parent with someone who makes me so mad I could theoretically bash their
head in with a frying pan. So in this
age of political correctness and high divorce rates I have decided to help out
my fellow divorcees and start a list on the successful ways in which to
co-parent with an idiot. This is going
to be an evolving list as I am sure that more ideas will come to me when my
temper finally settles down. I also
encourage anyone that reads this to add ideas of their own.
1.
Be happy with the monumental $400 a month
child support for 2 children.
Raising kids is not a
cheap undertaking. So when your ex goes
to court and pleads to not have to pay child support because they do not have a
job (CODE FOR: I am getting paid under the table) be happy that they finally
agree to pay $400 a month. Who cares
that they left your children without a roof over their head or you without a
car to get them back and forth to school.
The first rule to successful co-parenting with and idiot is THE IDIOT IS
MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE CHILDREN.
2.
Never mention a word about the
thousands they owe you in back child support.
This one is a real
kicker. When you see your ex buying boats
and new cars it is not a good idea to ever mention the back child support that
they owe you. Who cares that they are
taking expensive vacations and wasting money on expensive things while their
children have to go without, after all their happiness is more important than
their children’s.
3.
When it comes their weekend to get the
child/children and the ex is too busy “working” do not get upset.
What does it really matter that it has been months since your ex has seen
their children? I mean who are you to expect that your co-parent would actually
like to see and spend time with their children?
Your co-parent is a very busy person, and after all their happiness is
more important than their child’s.
4.
When your ex meets someone knew, never
get upset that they are having sleep overs while your children are there.
Being a parent is stressful especially
when you only see your children 20 to 30 days out of the year. So of course the ex will want to go out and
let off some steam. Eventually the ex
will go on to meet someone new. When
they do, and after a month or so of knowing this knew person they introduce
them to your children and have sleep overs while the kids are there never get upset. When your ex moves there new significant other
in, and has your children sleep on the floor in the living room so that the new
girlfriend/boyfriend can have a room for their kids to sleep in never get mad. Your
ex’s happiness is the only thing that matters.
5.
When your kids tell you that your ex
no longer loves them do not get upset. Never let the pain you see in your
children make you mad.
One day my oldest son told me
that his father no longer loved him. I
told him that was not true and that his father was working a lot and that is
why he could not see him. He pointed out
that I worked and I was still able to take care of him. When this time comes, and for some it will
come, LIE to your children. NEVER EVER
let your children know what an idiot your ex is. The ex’s happiness is the most important
thing to them, but for normal parents like us it’s our children’s happiness
that means the most. Kids love their
parents no matter what, and shattering their view of their parent only hurts
them. The idiot could care less.
Ok so for now my list is complete. I am sure that I will come up with many, many more ideas to add to the list. Feel free to leave your own suggestions to the comments below, and follow my blog.
